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Black lives matter – to whom?

When you assert that something matters, you are expressing a value. But a value does not exist as an objective truth in a vacuum. Rather, a value is something that is held by a person capable of judging.

You can not talk about what matters without talking about the individuals that it matters to.

When you tell me that black lives matter, then I must ask: To whom?

To be realistic, I would expect this to be followed by the loaded question: So you think black lives do not matter?

And I would say: Not to me, no.

And I would expect to be guilt-tripped and shamed a little, back and forth, blah blah yada.

But seriously, why should I – me as an individual – care about black lives? What does that even mean?

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U.S. Navy: The false dream of serving the country

Do you consider joining the Navy to become a man? Or a patriot? This is the story of a dude who became a Submarine Warfare Officer at the U.S. Navy and grew disillusioned about the organization.

Like me, he is a dude without a father, if in a different way. I only know him from the internet, but I like his writing, thus I asked him to write down this story.

I can not vouch for the accuracy of the story and neither can he, as he wants to stay anonymous. Thus, take this with a grain of salt. I am inclined to trust him, as I can empathize with his perspective, the perspective of an unflinching refusal to sucker up to authority. This makes it an interesting read for me and maybe for you, as it allows one to see past the usual blindfold.

Having no personal experience with the military, I will just leave the rest of the story uncommented and open for your personal judgment.

Despite the compact writing style, it is quite lengthy, so you may want to set aside some special time for this read.


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“Big Game” praises a father’s disrespect

Some days ago I visited a nearby forest. It was almost dark and when I approached the trees, I heard animals move hastily. I was afraid. As I entered the woods, I was immediately immersed in a feeling I recall from my Ayahuasca ceremony, as I had been running from the others.

Trying to make out shapes in the noisy dusk, I became very alarmed and realized I had no weapon. I intuitively looked around and saw a dry branch that I decided to break away from the tree.

As I went about doing it, this sheep voice entered my mind again.

But that is just a piece of wood. You are naive. You must ask a professional hunter how to do it the right way. You are not even a real warrior.

That was when I realized how profoundly I lacked confidence in my own judgment.

I asked god for love and trust in my reason and my wish was fulfilled. For the first time since I can remember, I trusted my intuition. God’s respect for me accomplished it.

I broke off the branch. It was hard and stiff. I decided it was a good weapon and moved on without further doubt.

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From the ugly guy


I am the ugly guy inside Tom.

I am not sure what you idiots want to hear from me. Yeah, I call you that. I am not whimsical at all, unlike Tom. He fears for you not liking him and respecting him and all that stuff. Me? I do not give a single fuck. For all I know, you could go off and die.

Tom wants me to write something here, some therapeutic bullshit presumably. He says it is long overdue; I think he should care less about you guys and more about himself. But whatever, maybe he can get some gems out of this, too.

What am I to say? Tom feels ashamed of me. He sees all I can do and wants to do it, but he is too proud to “come down to my level”. He sees me take one of those bitches he keeps thinking about but is too much of a disgusting coward to talk to. And he says he wants to do it, too, but he is lying. Tom wants to keep up some kind of image of innocence or stoicism or whatever idiotic ideal he invents or reads about on the internet. He feels that being like me would make him look dirty or something.

Yeah, Tom is a proud prince. Tom is a bitch. He does not even really care for you. How could he? He is a shadow of the man he could be if he accepted me as a part of him. He is a shadow and a shadow can not respect or like. A shadow can just be a shadow.

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Disrespect your elders – politics of fear

If you were born into a strong tribe, what is it that you would expect from your elders? What would you expect from your father? Demands, of course. Demands of virtue, of courage, of strength. Challenges and a way into manhood, following your instincts. Pure joy of life.

When I met my father, that is what I got. Adventure, exploration. It spoke to me on a deep level and immensely satisfied me. Yet I felt about it as a bit of a guilty pleasure, as if my dad and me were doing something forbidden, wrong, childish, unreasonable. These were the kind of things my mother had not fostered, had feared. No, I don’t hate her for it. These were the things that politicians and older people told me were unreasonable to do. Too dangerous, reckless, unnecessary – yet the things that make me feel alive.

Who the fuck are these people to tell me? My genes tell me that they are my elders, that they should know. I naturally want to listen to them.

Yet I am not part of a strong tribe. The people who are my elders today are weaklings and leaders of weaklings. Priests who tell me that life is miserable and that god will liberate me. Leftists who moan about the unfairness of life and can’t think about anything besides suffering. People who stand still in front of a red light despite of no imminent danger. Teachers who want me to be careful about my words because they might hurt the weak.

These are my elders? My genes tell me that they are wise. But they are fags, so fuck them.

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How to deal with failure – Part 3: Success and courage

So I’m not running from inner emptiness anymore. For now. Incidentally, if you honestly stop running from it and surrender, it merely hits you in the face a few times and leaves. The feeling of guilt, if you don’t act on it, slowly ebbs and subsides. Thus, with time, you learn to not let these emotions control you – for they are temporary. And when you learn that they are temporary, you may even stop noticing them. You may become a shameless anti-hero.

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Challenging your inner child: Jesus died for your sins

There is the interpretation of Christianity that, to be with God in heaven, all you need to do is believe that Jesus died for your sins and you will be automatically forgiven. Blind faith is too much to ask from a non-religious man like me, but the whole concept may not be as stupid as it sounds. Let’s dig into it.

I already wrote about stopping hatred and much of what I wrote is true, but I made a mistake that kept me from fully integrating the insight. To distance myself from the guilt of not being perfect, I projected it onto my mother. I deduced that she was the invisible spectator judging all my actions. But that didn’t help me, because it ultimately wasn’t true.

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What are values?

I want her and I don’t give a fuck what this means for your relationship. If you can’t take that she flirts with me, grow some balls. It upsets me that she flirts with you because she shouldn’t need that. If you honestly want to be with her, have her; to me, you sounded just like one of the hundreds of guys who want to fuck her. But if you break her heart, I will break your bones. No, I don’t want to be with her; I want to fuck her, I am one of the hundred guys. Okay, so you’re going after a girl whom you know to be in a relationship; apparently, you don’t even have values. I take back my blessings; do not contact me again.

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What is self-respect and how does it help your game?

What is self-respect and why is it important?

Self-respect is a social word means dignity. With dignity, you can look another man in the eye. Self-respect is to not let another man carry your weight. Likewise, a man who respects you acknowledges that you do not expect him to do so.

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Capitalism: The hope of the hopeless – Part 2: Evaluation

Alright, I had promised you self-respect and values. And what I gave you was a story that probably left you a bit sick to the stomach. Why the fuck would I propose such a behavior? Well, on another note, why exactly did Tom act the way he did?

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