A place for a

01.02.2016

Greatness: Envy, respect or indifference?

Many successful people go on about their haters. Sooner or later, you will find some kind of post where they vent about all the haters. My former Muay Thai instructor did it almost constantly and this photographer here did it once, too. They go on about all the hard work they put in that nobody sees. You are just enviousYou do not see those sleepless nights!

Well, I guess that people do become envious. Sure. Who does not. But sometimes even your favorite photographer can post a picture that you simply dislike. And what would you say if you wanted to be honest and the photographer was your friend? Well, you would likely say this is shit.

I once commented on a photograph of Ronda Rousey that I hate the fact that there are women out there who could beat me to pulp. The fitness coach who had posted it came-a-running and told me to do something about it! Yeah, yeah, I get it. We all push each other to greatness. Blah, blah. How predictable.

But what if my road to greatness does not lead through the gym? What if I just want to express an emotion here without having to already be on my way to be better? Hell, if I lept to my feet to work hard towards greatness every time I was envious, I would be on a quest to be better than everyone at everything. But my greatness is not necessarily your greatness.

So what is it? What is the correct emotion to feel?

I guess you can credit Americans for having this business-mentality. From McCafe-server to McMillionaire. But what point is there in hurriedly storming towards greatness when you have not even a glimpse of an idea about what greatness really means to you?

So there you have all those hard working sheep. Sure, they are hard working, but they are still sheep. If you are working towards somebody else’s dream, you may just as well not be working at all. In fact, I suggest you stop dreaming then, because it is obviously harming you. Better to walk quietly and let the currents of your passion direct you than to put on the blindfolds and pursue some career you would not give your pet rat’s ass about.

When somebody is more muscular, has more women, is a better fighter, what is it? Do I have to leap to my feet and improve myself? Fuck that. I am good enough. I am Tom.

Is there only the choice between destructive envy and competitive respect? No. There is also the choice to not give a fuck. If I feel envy, so be it. If I feel respect, so be it. Do I have to respect a photographer because of all his hard work? No. Does that make me a hater? No. And hell, if I hate something he did, big deal. I hated women, too.

The emotion of envy or respect does not necessitate action. Being worse at something than someone else does not necessitate competition, no matter how you feel about it. Besides – even if it sounds like a cliche already – there is truly no one better at being you than yourself.

Stop being a sheep of slogans. Stop trying to fix yourself all the time, you are fine. Just do what you want to do. Stop being a spitlicker of the successful people and gurus, a self-denying slave of the self-help industry and an adorer of those who made it.

Sometimes those successful guys look like the biggest losers to me. Whenever they cry about their haters. They are like big babies demanding constant adoration and affection. Nothing wrong about being a baby, of course – but you do not want a baby to be your guru. Your guru should stand above you and not lower himself and get butthurt if you do not like all his shit.

Incidentally, my former Muay Thai instructor is my former instructor mainly because he asked me to like all his stuff on Facebook and I wrote him back that I find it too stressful. He then stopped talking to me and blocked me on Facebook. Before that incident, he treated me like his favorite student. After that, as if I did not exist.

It is this weird brotherhood thing. Be your brother’s keeper. Everyone for everybody or something the like. Keep pulling each other up. We must sustain the standard! Yeah right, but where is up? What if I disagree about the direction? Ah, the questions of life.

So fucking stressful. Life is hardBut we, the strong, strong men bear the burden of the earth with our hard workWe must be better than those leeches and weaklingsWe must serve evolution!

Fucking victims.

Ever wonder why you need your brothers to keep pushing you towards greatness? Why it feels so hard? Because you do not really give a damn about what they think. About their greatness. You are merely used and conditioned to let others command you around. It feels comfortable. You have no idea what you really want. Aside from being one of the successful people.

And what the heck is success, again?

Hey, that fat guy with the builder’s cleavage who fixed your bath yesterday. What a loser, right? You never see guys like him in the tehveh. But he lives. Maybe he even likes what he does. So where is he on the greatness scala? Who knows. But I bet that most of the normal folks are more concerned with fucking girls than with impressing them!

Fuck this hectic microcosm of life-survivors.

2 votes
  • BlueEyedDevil

    Great article, Tom.
    So your Muay Thai instructor stopped talking to you, and blocked you on FB because you wouldn’t give a “like” to all his FB crap? WTF? In some ways he sounds like a 14 y/o girl.

  • Great post Tom. I had to take an inward glance after reading this, which is always a good thing. “Am I doing this for me? Do I give a fuck about haters? Am I always trying to fix myself?” Yes and no. But I think ultimately it does not matter, because I am pretty cool with what /who I am. Part of that comfort comes from that perpetual self-improvement, but the standard is me. Who was I yesterday compared to today.

    But for real though. Who gives a fuck about anyone else? Every time I start getting influenced by others, I wind up in a world of hurt. I am good as long as I stick to my own shit.