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01.12.2015

How to eat Christmas cookies like a man

I read this concept related to stoicism, related to pain. You can apply it to eating overly sugared Christmas cookies as well. Bite into it. Resist your initial revulsion and let the sweetness wash through your system. Let it consume your taste buds until they almost feel like they will explode, then – without force, but with curious awareness follow the path of the sweetness through your system. Down to your gut and along your spine, where it morphs into a sensation of shocked surprise.

Be observing, but do not judge. Take in every nuance of the emotion. Follow the trail of the sweetness with your inner eye and give it loving attention.

Along with the sweetness will come emotions of shame and fear of becoming fat. You will become acutely aware of your fatty tissue and feel your body very keenly. Also accept these feelings and let them wash through your organism, soul and mind like a tidal wave washes over the beach.

You will want to dissociate from these emotions or push them away. Do not do that. Persevere. Take it like a man, with relaxed amusement.

Eventually, you will feel the emotions fade away and vanish and can smile and thank your grandmother for the pleasure.

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  • Wald

    Sometimes people hear something and get an unpleasant image in their head. It’s all they can do to not think about it.

    Same with feelings. They don’t realize that they can let the feeling go if they let it happen. Eventually, it will pass over them.

    It’s easier said than done, with some things of course, but most things – pain, disgust, bad thoughts – you can dispel by letting them pass through.

    Wald

    • Indeed. I am learning this, albeit slowly. Meditation helps me a lot in that. There were so many memories of emotions that I never dared to process. Now I am letting them in one by one, going through them, letting them into my soul. And by that, they fade and I become indifferent to so many things. For example, I am – compared to two months ago – almost completely indifferent to approval now. I have traced all the memories down to the original cause of why I wanted approval. I found the associations with it. The shame. The humiliation. My old weak self and weak parts in me now. And you know, with time, whatever thought you think and whatever you feel, it stops to upset you. You just say ‘ah, this is anger and sorrow’ or ‘ah, this is joy’. The mind stays calm at all times – as the ideal goal, that is.

      I will post an article on how to do a frog poison ritual today. Nausea is something that was always very strong in it for me. Find it hard to tolerate. Brings up associations with rape, humiliation, alcohol, pissing myself in the jungle in front of others, the taste of Ayahuasca, chili. It is funny how this chain of thought seems to always have latently existed, keeping myself from feeling nauseous, out of fear of that chain of thoughts and emotions. But once you trace them to the root, they just happen. And it becomes irrelevant.

      Something that crossed my mind is the military and how guys learn to dissociate from pain. I wonder if that is not the opposite of letting it pass through. If that is a good thing or if it just makes one a sheep that can not relax anymore. Any thoughts?

      • Micah Geni

        They have to dissociate. Problem is to reconnect, later. Takes practise. “Helps” with a borderline psycho as a parent. Either you make it or break it :p

        Problem with reconnecting these days, for soliders, is that they “feel/understand” that they were not told the whole truth about why they were needed. Yet they go through a lot of unhuman experiences, to come back to a wife, that found it “impossible to wait because life was so hard without you..”. and loads of other nonsense.

        • Yeah, that is always the thing with pain. The information it contains. It breaks the narrative, which you feel ashamed of. You feel ashamed of it, because the guys on top do not want you to reach this information. So they say ‘A man feels no pain’. And the blind sheep believe it helps them.

          • Micah Geni

            The top dont want ex-soldiers “testify” about all the bullshit. In addition, some of the top may struggle themselves, and prefer to live on in denial :)

            Not only military works that way. Even our “best and most hailed western socities” suffers from same self-deluding mechanisms.

            Who is really profiting from all this nonsense ? Some like to say “the jews”, no matter what.. It is like when people describe “weird food”..

            “I was in china and ate dog meat”… “really how did it taste like ?”…. “Well hard to explain.. A bit like CHIKCKEN”.. Replace the dog with snake-meat. A total different type of “meat” one would imagine, and yet the answer will still be “chicken”.

            Problem of the world. Doesnt matter which one, some people always land on “the jews”.

            But let’s face it. Arent for instance Women in general, as a group, earning a lot more on a war ? They get widow pension, and can remarry, without sacrificing anything, but a husband they sincerely knew that 9 of 10 would become bored with anyway.. An ugly fact. Let there be equality and have them do their own dirty work. !. What the fuck to they risk ? Even with a surviving man, he may be related to the industry anyhow. So she will not have to work, since war keeps him busy, earning money for her. Sloth, Gluttony :)

            For (Gods) US sake, I do not hope Hillary becomes their next. As a group, women are simply more irresponsible and opportunistic than men. And when busted and caught, they just shed some tears, and men starts to find good reasons to have them excused. Fucking tragically hilarious..

          • Yeah. Good observation. I have this theory about how emotional expression was destroyed in people.

            War. Veterans come home with PTSD. No one knows. No one tells them. They become fathers of kids. They see the kids in pain and can not express their own pain. They become angry and say ‘Kid, swallow it. Men do not feel pain.’

            And so it goes on and on through the generations, until people say ‘To be a man is to not feel pain’. The first men who got deadened set out to deaden all others in the name of ‘manhood’.

            Yes, women. You know, I thought of it. They profit the MOST out of most of intra-male shaming. I think they originated it. Like shaming of weak or ugly men. Know why? I think it is because they do not want to fuck them and want to look down on them, as they disgust them. But that arrogance makes the men want to rape the girls out of anger. So the girls need the strong men – whom they reward with sex – put the weak ones down and look down on them with contempt. So men are played against other men by their dependance to pussy.

            I wonder if that is an abberation or the true nature of reality that one has to acknowledge. What is the alternative?

            Women are weak, and yet they want to stand above weak men. They can only afford that with protection.

            I have had more ideas about how women profit, too, but I have forgotten some of them, somewhere among my notes.

            Have you read Schopenhauer on women?
            http://www.theabsolute.net/misogyny/onwomen.html

            Very interesting. Says that women are a hivemind with the prime imperative of procreation of the species. They do not love men, they only use men as it is suited for their prime goal: Ensure the survival of the species.

            Intuit a bit about it. It feels very true to me. That is why women seem almost a bit detached and unfeeling at times. And why they shame and police and organize. Because they do not care for men. They care for the species.

            And there can only be a balance if men do not just let them walk all over them and instead value what their own nature tells them to value: Freedom. Then the hivemind becomes interested in those free individuals and has to pay a price for locking them down. For instance, marriage with guaranteed sex.

            Naturally, that no longer works. Women just want to follow their imperative to fuck around with the strongest. But yeah, who takes care of the children? Easy. The state. So yeah, matriarchy. The dominance of mothers. Pure survival and procreation. Happiness is not so important, as they do not seem to feel emotions the way we do. They are only motivated by their imperative to fuck the fittest.

            This female nature lies like a burden on the shoulders of us men and we must never mistake it for a friendly force. A dangerous force it is. One that can be exploited and dealt with in terms of pleasure, but never trusted blindly.

          • Micah Geni

            One has to wonder if women as a group is naturally born with inferiority complex, or dick-envy as one called it. And inferiority complex, is “natural narcissism”.

            I read this experiment recently. Cannot remember all the details. If a group was given testo or simply was higher on it naturally. Well anway I shall translate the essence of it. Two female groups, one high, the other low, on testo. Given indivually, say 100 box. They could either share this with the rest of the group, and the do something socially. Get to know each other over a dinner or such. The other alternative was simply to keep it all for them selves. This is Egotism Vs Altruism.

            Turned out the high-testo fell more towards altruism, then the low-testo females.

            “Take it as a man”, is really destructive advice, for all but women.

            I’ve said it earlier. The general rule is that the less I care emotionally about a women, but just behave “decent”, the more interested they become. Something to “conquer”. Psick.

            I gotta trust my brother Loki, on this one. Because he is a female in a males body (kind of malish body). “Every woman is a whore”, is his slogun :)
            In a more sophisticated phrase: Every woman is an opportunist. He has a point. And he has a lot of experience from working abroad, and paying for a lot of stuff.

            He is wrong about “everybody”. Some have high enough limits, that I would exclude them. But he still has a point.

            I see some guys from the middle-east, that behave like women. Some in my block. So is it only females ? Or is it more related to the culture they are from ? In the west, we do not demand responisibility for their actions, from females. In the middle-east I guess the same could be said about a lot of men.

          • They were given 100 box? You mean bucks? Money? Or testo?

            Yeah, it makes sense. Kinda. When you feel weak, you become greedy. Which is evolutionarily logical. A beggar does not share his bread.

            But here is another take: What if women, too, are victims of this shaming? What if they, too, are suppressing their true natures and thus this dick-envy and weird behavior starts? What if their observed behavior is indeed not as natural as it is common? I mean, being a cuck seems to be quite common these days, and yet it is not the psychologically and spiritually healthy way.

            As for girls coming to you when you seem indifferent enough, that makes a lot of sense to me. Women want to serve. I think it is good. But they only want to serve the strongest. It has to be earned. Their imperative: Give yourself to the most fit man you can find.

            All else irrelevant. Pure instinct.

          • Micah Geni

            We are all victims… and abusers..
            Its the attitude that remain in a persons mind, that says most.

          • I think that both are one. Let go of being a victim and you stop being an abuser, too. You just lose the resonance. Letting go of course means ’embracing’.

  • Micah Geni

    Thouths about this one ? In particularly the ending :
    https://mikkemusblog.wordpress.com/2015/12/03/psychopaths/

  • This was very powerful. I am a vain ass mother fucker, and constantly battling the urge to shy away from certain enjoyments in life because of my fear of getting chubby. But what is life if not to enjoy? How can I enjoy if I am not taking an experience for what it is vice what it will end up as? There is a fine line between seeking instant gratification and deciding for a better future. This post has made that line very visible.

    • Haha, interesting what you read into it. My intent was to mock the disgusting sugary shit, but you found a life lesson in it. Well, Andrew, I have become quite chubby and I hate it. But I also realize that it was my choice and something in me needed the experience. Maybe it is simply something you have to try out.

      I figure that fear is a good thing. But it is often hard to tell what a fear wants to tell us unless we actually acknowledge it. Your fear may be trying to tell you ‘come on, overcome me and enjoy yourself’. But it may also be tellling you ‘do not become one of those fat assholes’. I guess the way to find out is to let yourself feel that fear fully. That is what helps me with fear as well as with shame in my meditations.

      Sometimes I am ashamed of things that I do not really want. Like being gay. But I always first have to consider doing it and LOSE the shame before I can actually listen to the underlying emotions and realize that I actually do not want it. Shame and fear mask our real intentions and cloud our senses; it is quite amazing.