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The most liberating and awesome thing I did today

I was lying in bed, minding my own business as I heard an approaching voice amplified by a megaphone. It cried out some bullshit, then a mass would repeat it, like war cries.

It bugged me.

Being somewhat tense anyway, and now having my quietude disturbed by these idiots, I went out to see what it was, hoping it would be bullshit I could be angry about. It was.

A big group of maybe two hundred animal rights activists was marching through my peaceful neighborhood and had already passed my place. Police and city services was escorting them. One of the police girls looked hot.

I was not sure what I was up to myself as I automatically started catching up on the sideway. A simple, yet arousing idea formed in my head and as I perceived it, I was tempted – purely by habit – to drop it. My chest filled with hot fear.

But something was different this time. I kept going, without thinking.

I caught up near a supermarket and passed one last girl on the sideway who was packing her stuff. The sheep were repeating their current chant: “Out of the laboratoriums! Out of the laboratoriums!”.

They sounded so meek and pitiful. A sad bunch of bored city hipsters. A few hot girls in there.

I was now pretty much near the center of the march. Perfect.

I turned around to face the crowd, breathed in and shouted as loudly as I could: “Hey, you animal fuckers!“. I was surprised by the loudness of my voice, which silenced out everything else. People turned around. As I had their attention, I flipped two birds at them and shouted again: “Eat shit!

Some guys flipped birds at me, too. I did not care. That had felt so good.

The girl at the supermarket looked at me as if I was crazy. A big wide and mischievous grin formed on my face and I calmly started to walk back.

As I passed the last small group of protesters – hot girls – something awesome happened. I do not think I ever saw hot girls smiling at me like that. They shouted something and one joyfully and childishly stuck out her tongue.

Despite the fact that I had just insulted them, they looked innocently fulfilled, like little schoolgirls in love.

In the past, I always ignored such politically incorrect observations.

With the same mischievous grin on my face, I joyfully gave them thumbs up.

But more than them looking fulfilled, I felt fulfilled.

These idiots had disturbed me and I had repaid them. It really was so simple. I did not care if they were right, if they had deserved it or whether they were good people. I only thought about myself. I was – in that moment – one with my masculinity. It was not moral, it was not for a greater cause, it was just for myself – something I needed to do.

Pure, innocent joy.

Life as it is meant to be.

So, the guys angrily flip birds at me, the girls cheer me. For insulting them!

Animal rights. One big shit test?

My ecstasy had a primitive, almost sexual quality. Which reminds me of Tank Abbot in the early UFC shows shamelessly saying that he was sexually aroused when he beat up the other guy and looked into the crowd.

The only other time I can remember feeling this way was when I ruthlessly pursued a female colleague at the grill party.

As I walk back home and try to use the keyhole, I notice that my fingers tremble in excitement. I feel a fading sensation of guilt, but do not care today. Do they not call it guilty pleasure for that reason?

I did this without alcohol and I did it fully. Had I not done it out of my own need to do it, it would have been meek and I would not have enjoyed it.

Does it always feel this good to be an asshole?

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  • Della

    “So, the guys angrily flip birds at me, the girls cheer me. For insulting them!”

    The hilarious part is that you managed to accomplish something in 30 secs than most of those weak , neck bearded hipster men were trying achieve in what was probably months of protests and group meetings… the attention of those hot girls.

    • I bet that is true! Quite a motivation to keep developing myself in that direction.

    • Micah Geni


  • BlueEyedDevil

    I agree with the description of your action as “awesome.” Something like that takes guts… even when you know the pussy males involved in such nonsense as “animal rights” pose about ZERO physical threat to you. Well done.
    Love the response of some of those chicks. Your macho audacity, on some level, probably turned them on.

    • Thanks mate. I am not always as ballsy, but the moment cried for it. As for the males, I actually kinda hoped they would do more. You know, a kind of little initiation rite – getting beaten up by idiots.

      Yeah, the chicks loved it. Stupid cunts.

  • Jim Jones Koolaid

    Its surprising the effect on other people when you become dangerous. When you dont fear and when you do as you like.