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09.10.2015

The majestic beauty ideal and the perfect 10

A commenter wrote that I do not even know what kind of woman I like. He was right. I thought I wanted girls that most consider 10s. But I just wanted to be the guy who gets them. The truth is that I do not find them attractive at all. Today’s 10 is a majestically cut, meager face with an arrogant indifferent expression. A face to be worshipped, a face made to command, the face of a female sovereign. But not a face to fall in love with, not the face of a woman for a man.

Men discuss truths about 10s. But look at these 10s. They are not girls. They are queens and rulers. They have neither the face nor the character of a girl. They do not look attractive as much as they look dangerous.

I wanted them because getting them would make me a man who has them. It was a mimetic desire; not a desire to have, but a desire to be. A desire to be complete.

Now that I feel more complete, the unsatiable urge to be is gone. With it gone is the wish to have what everybody wants.

All that remains is the appetite for a girl. For a girl with a kind and welcoming face and personality and a soft body I can cum on. One that has not dissociated from her inherent femininity and desire to be appreciated as a girl just like I had dissociated from my desire to be appreciated as a man.

I want her to be cute and I want her to be sweet. Not always, of course, not forced. I want her sweetness to be the free expression of herself, not the result of her own wish to be approved of. I want her kindness to be an expression of confidence, not one of shyness. I want her submission to be a expression of her wish to gift herself to me and be bestially dominated, not one of guilt and obligation. I want femininity, not a caricature of femininity.

A memory

I once met such a girl. She was a student of mine. She liked me, but she had an ugly face and I could not appreciate her femininity back then. She wanted to meet me and she came with a beautiful pink dress. The way she touched me was healing; the way she treated me made me feel manly without taking away from her. She was like a warm wind flowing around the rock that was me. Her soft silk dress only complemented the softness of her breasts when she was close to me. She smelled wonderfully.

But I did not feel like a rock. I did not think I deserved this. I felt no anguish with her, like with the girls I desired. Being able to have her made her unattractive to me. I felt contempt for her kindness. I did not want a girl; I wanted a ruler. And, yeah, her face was really ugly, as I said. That would stop me even today. But truly, her personality was just what I would wish for today.

This is the girl I met:

Feminine girl

I took pictures of her. She moved and posed excitedly like a little girl, without shame. And that is what she was. And that is what I desire. A girl who is one with her femininity and to whom I can show my animal side. A girl I can own and who does not object to it.

Something meek

I remember a time in kindergarden when I used to play with a Japanese girl. I like Japanese girls. They are cute and feminine when I see them sitting in cafes in Munich. I imagine their soft little hands carressing my dick.

Here is a stock picture of one I found that I liked:

Feminine beauty

Here is a popular girl that I like:

Just look at her beautiful, innocently sexual movement. Her sexual energy is so shameless and strong that she can barely contain it and sprays it in all directions. Does she even have an idea what this does to a healthy man? Like a cute little bunny only waiting for a man whom she can explore her dark side with. Just makes me hard instantly and puts a mischievous grin on my face.

Watching her makes me sad, too, because I will likely never have her and not be able to physically express what I feel for her. Even more sadly, she seems to have fucked herself up with ugly tattoos and hair. Look at that sad expression in her face. That self-destruction breaks my heart. Breaks my heart because I could never love her after she did this to herself. Breaks my heart, because she is no longer worthy of my love and desire – but would have easily been, had she not thrown it away. Now all I feel is pity. What happened to her? Did she lose herself in the relentless black void of existence? Lindy West disease?

Anyway.

What I want is simple feminine beauty. Nothing extravagant. A welcoming smile from a mouth that would enjoy taking care of my cock and submit to all my dirty fantasies.

I do not want her to be too meager. I do not want to see too many angular features. I want her to have just a tiny amount of fatty tissue to cover up the bones and provide some fleshy grip and a soft tissue to spread my cum on. Tissue that will lightly wobble while I fuck her in her dirty little ass. Without flesh, there is no fleshly pleasure.

I do not want to have to be a total dick to her. Not because that is not a part of my personality, but because I do not want to be forcing it all the time. Neither do I want to be nice and careful all the time. She either likes and wants me as I am or she goes. Why waste my time with a girl that does not appreciate me as I am? Why waste my time with a girl that considers my wish to take her an offense or my wish to love her as weakness? I am better off on my own.

She should also be around a head shorter than me so that I can handle and carry her well and feel strong around her (I am 6 feet tall).

Not something skewed up

Seriously. I do not want a fitness freak or business woman or an educated one. I do not want a woman who will boss me around or who can and wants to engage in intellectual discussions.

What for?

To prove to myself that I am manly enough to be even stronger than such a woman? To man up? To prove I do not feel threatened? But that is tiresome. I do not need to prove that to myself. What for? Whom for? I just want to enjoy my life with someone who wants the same.

The beauty ideal is less about the ideal woman than about the ideal man society wants you to be. A man who will worship.

I do not need the best woman or the most desired woman. I do not want a woman as a status symbol. You want those 10s with almost alien qualities? You can have them, I do not give a fuck. Leaves all the cute ones for me.

When I was in Iquitos in Peru, the streets were full of little indigenous looking chicks who gave me submissive smiles as I proudly passed by. There were many of them, but I only need one. What is the point of having many when I have just what I want in one? What is the point of that kind of redundancy?

Having many women was only ever a wish to satisfy some kind of ideal of a player. A wish for approval. Of mommy? Of women in general? Or simply to compensate that I did not really want any kind of intimacy with any of them, so the quantity would have to make up for the quality. Which is, by the way, just what I hear from those who have played the game for some time.

I do not want the relationship to be anything special. I do not want us to be each other saviors. There is no tragedy to be saved from. I just want to be a man who wants to fall in love with a sweet woman and her to be a sweet woman who wants to fall in love with a man. The most natural thing on earth. It could be any of a million women that fit these criteria, but I only need one. There is no the one.

I am no longer in danger of one-itis, I hope. Because those girls never were the one. There was the one in my life that I saw in all of them.

My mother was the one. The one that I never managed to get real love from. Had she not rejected me, she would not have become the one. She made herself special through hurting me. I am no longer interested in being hurt. I ended that shit.

There is no the one. But every one is special.

Conclusion

Today, we seem to not like women that are attractive. We like women that are majestic.

We do not seek women for ourselves. We seek rulers. Mistresses that command us and our attention.

We seek majestic faces meant to be worshipped and obeyed, but not to be loved. For a face that commands must be strong. But a face that is to be desired by a man must be meek.

The trend of the arrogant meager model surely correlates with the symptom of feminism (the dyke movement that has nothing to do with femininity) and the projection of male features into women: Leadership, short hair, angular faces, arrogance, pride, sexual aggression.

Not that the majestic woman is not lovable or okay. But I do not find her desirable. She fits the rare man that really wants to be dominated – if he exists.

Could I take her anyway and ignore it? Yes, but why would I? To be a good person? To prove that I can see past the surface? But what for? I do not have to prove anything.

Does it make me a bad person if I choose a woman whom I really want?

But indeed, having a majestic face is a form of tragedy on its own. Her face is her prison. A feminine smile and lipstick on a majestic face will only heighten the sense of confusion and make her look like a predator. Her tragedy is similar to the one of a tall woman. A double bind like the evolutionary double bind:

Bateson used the fictional Bread and Butter Fly (from Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There) to illustrate the double bind in terms of natural selection. The gnat points out that the insect would be doomed if he found his food (which would dissolve his own head), and starve if he did not. Alice suggests that this must happen quite often, to which the gnat replies “it always happens”.

If she chooses to act cute and feminine, it will not fit her. If she chooses to be arrogant, it will make her only so much more undesirable.

All she can hope for is a stronger or taller man.

Antonio Montana wanted a tiger.

But that does not have to be my choice.

I do not want a majesty in my house. I want a girl.

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  • thordaddy

    You want femininity, but reject “feminists?” How so?

    Do not forget how damaged these females are… How much BS that they have swallowed about “having it all.” The modern female is, in the privacy of her own being, very, very scared for her future. If she is not, it’s only because extreme ignorance, low IQ or abnormal isolation. For the normal females, they can really ONLY HOPE for future normalcy while always demanding for something more. In other words, if you want to attain a goal then gear yourself to go BEYOND that goal in the hopes that such an overreach will AT LEAST bring you to your goal.

    • You want femininity, but reject “feminists?” How so?

      Feminists are against femininity. Feminists are for equality.

      • thordaddy

        Yes… That is why it is ABSURD to call them “feminists” when they are devout dykes or de facto dykes… Radical female liberationists… NOT ladies or women or even girls anymore. Driven by radical sexual autonomy. Self-annihilators.

        To call an entity absolutely devoid of even a nano-scintilla of femininity, “feminism,” is a total perversion of reality IN THE SAME MANNER that white Supremacist was “sold” to the white male masses as an entity equal to the “white degenerate.” Of course, for the truly degenerate of our kind, “we” should only expect that they will, without hestitation, embrace a false conception of themselves as the “best” of whites… As “white supremacists.” That the enemies of wS engage in this perpetuating self-deception is now well understood.

        The POINT…

        You pontificate with reckless regard for the particular truth WHEN you write of phenomena outside your creation.

        I DO have a duty to a fellow “white” male to provide greater insight where I can.

        • total perversion of reality IN THE SAME MANNER that white Supremacist was “sold” to the white male masses as an entity equal to the “white degenerate.”

          Damn, that makes sense!

          Language is a bitch, is she not.

          You pontificate with reckless regard for the particular truth WHEN you write of phenomena outside your creation.

          What do you mean?

        • Look, I made a correction.

      • thordaddy

        And to take the analysis further, YOU are driven by radical sexual autonomy (lust for Asians, tolerant of masturbation, sexual explicit public pronouncements) AND SO YOU PURPOSELY mislabel the phenomenon of devout dyke movement IN ORDER to stunt the sexual maturity of predominantly white females to what you gather is your long term personal benefit.

        • No. I simply call it the name I know. I do not benefit from immature white females. Well, aside from a few flings maybe.

          • thordaddy

            Maybe you do not, but the sexual degeneracy of the masses says many do…

            If you are a little girl or little boy and you first hear of femininity and learn that it is this “thing” that females can possess to make themselves extremely beautiful, first, spiritually as a child and young girl, secondly, physically as a young woman and lady and then thirdly as matriarch and emblematic generational role model.

            Now, they hear of “feminists,” these crass, mean-faced, ugly man-haters… Who nonetheless speak out for the “right” of all females… And are TOTALLY DEVOID of any femininity.

            If you can “see” nothing else, you should at least “see” stark mind war and your unconscious acquiescence to “it.”

          • Matriarch? Wait, what kind of society do yoi have in mind, precisely?

          • thordaddy

            Not one LEAD by matriarchs… But one where matriarchs “teach” the lessons of possessing femininity to our daughters and disassociate them from that self-annihilating ethos of devout dyke “nature.”

          • Sounds good.

        • Besides, how does that ‘mislabeling’ achieve what you propose? As you noticed correctly, I reject the movement. When I talked to girls in the past, they usually were quite aware of the fact that feminism is not what they identify with.

          • thordaddy

            It’s a fine line between conceding to a fundamental uncertainty about reality and just plain admitting that one has indeed suffered a break from reality. If you cannot say what is real or not because you largely mimic then perhaps you need to find the source of yoiur downgrade?

          • And what would that be?

          • thordaddy

            Simple concession to the zeitgeist out of benefit, fear or ignorance. Maybe all three in the totality of things?

          • Can not say I benefitted a lot. Fear and ignorance are more plausible.

  • thordaddy

    At the very same time, there is a real gamble with a post like this… A potential self-sabotage requiring explanation to each and every normal female you might potentially be intimate with…

    • Not at all. I do not need to explain myself. And if I see a need to do so, I will do it shamelessly.

  • Micah Geni

    Thordaddy your alter ego ? hey, you remember kindergarten, before the age of 7-8 :) Great

    • Actually, this is something that my mother told me about. My own memory of it is very vague and tainted by sadness, in a way. A little light in the dark, you know. Maybe from a time where I still had a little sense of self to connect with somebody. Had my mother not told me about it, I may as well have forgotten it.

      • Micah Geni

        Why ?

        • The memory? Not sure. I usually do not venture back too far.

          • Micah Geni

            When you meet childhood friends or a school reunion ?

          • I was never invited to anything like that. I probably would not be interested, either.

          • Micah Geni

            Actually a bit sad to hear.

            I’ve had some great times. But I have struggled when we talk about very young age. Mainly because less good memories also comes to mind. Sometimes I even pretend I dont remember some funny episode, because I dont want to be stuck thinking toi much. Then worse memories arise.

            I guess it is a side-effect from repressing.

          • Well, yes. As I said, I never had real friends.

            Try some acid. As anti-repressant.

  • Jones

    Yeah. I never really understood, when I was younger, this whole thing about women with these bitchy faces and aggressive attitudes all over the media and advertisements. I just didn’t get it. Did people think this was attractive? If not, then why was it everywhere? I was confused for a while, until the perversion slowly started to take over me, too — during a long period of singlehood when I didn’t have any actual encounters with women to keep me straight. This sassy, bitchy woman we’re supposed to be attracted to is a compromise with feminism, a concession to reality, mostly concocted by the media for aspirational purposes. This is what they hope or wish men were attracted to, so that it would be compatible with feminism. As you rightly point out, it is not. It’s stupid. What men really want is an Elvgren girl.

    • Wow, Elvgren girls look fabulous!

      Yeah.

      Yesterday, I saw one of those pictures on Facebook, in a modeling group. I commented: Is there some kind of secret competition among models and photographers to depict extremely aggressive and unfeminine poses? I always think: Who wants to fuck such an annoyed face?

      The model replied to me and accused me of being impolite. Hell, she even wrote me a message, asking me what kind of shit I am writing. I wrote her back to kiss my ass.

      Some girl actually liked my comment. A male photographer asked me if I need help. I guess I must be mad.

      • Jones

        Haha. That’s right man, take the fight to ’em. They need to start realizing what’s going on under the surface. It’s sad that men have been so complicit in their own emasculation.

        It’s actually one of the things that pisses me off most in the entire world of gender relations (this face thing). It feels like needlessly depriving us of utopia. If not utopia, then one of the few really basic and available pleasures in life. Girls who are feminine.

        • Please explain that second paragraph. I fail to grasp what face thing you mean. Facebook? How does it deprive us of feminine girls?

          • Jones

            No, not Facebook, the fact that women take it upon themselves to emulate these sassy, bitchy examples of what women are supposed to look like, and thereby abandon their own femininity. And those personality traits are expressed mainly through the facial expression . . . though I guess not solely that.

          • Ah, now I get it. But it is more than just the face. It is also posture, clothes, et cetera. One of those models was flipping a bird at the camera. Barf.